Maksim Mrvica - Exodus

Recuperating

Berniece (Howard's Mom, played by spunky Debbie Reynolds): "I need that wedding. I need some beauty and some music and some placecards before I die. It's like heroin".

This is one of my favorite quips from the movie "In & Out" with Kevin Kline who plays Howard, a high school teacher who comes out of the closet, realizes he's gay, a couple of days before his wedding with Joan Cusack's character.

That quote came to mind when I began planning my friend's baby shower. I needed something to push me, to inspire me, to get my "oomph!" back. I needed the dawn after a very dark night.

What can possibly be more happy than a baby on the way? A bundle of joy, of hope. I threw my heart into it and I'm proud to say that it turned out quite nice and the momma-to-be was very happy.

Since I don't post photos of faces, you'll just have imagine the success of the shower with my home-made banner, the big fuschia gift that contained soon-to-be-mama's gifts and a copy of the CD with songs especially for a baby shower.

baby shower, originally uploaded by flubberwinkle.

I am posting the track list, hoping it will help other co-baby-shower-planners in their search for a good collection of "baby shower songs" or "songs with baby in the lyrics" etc.

You're welcome, future visitors who land on this page via web search:

1. Ain't No Mountain High Enough - Marvin Gaye & Tammi Terrell (no baby in the lyrics, but what any mother would do for her child)
2. Baby I Need Your Loving - The Four Tops
3. Baby Love - The Supremes (classic)
4. Baby One More Time - Britney Spears (OK, admittedly cheesy, but it does say oh babeh, babeh)
5. Be My Baby - The Ronettes
6. Can't Take My Eyes Off You - Frankie Valli (I love you baby! And if it's quite alright, I need you baby...)
7. Celebration - Kool And The Gang (no baby lyrics, but a baby shower IS a celebration after all)
8. Dancing In The Street - Martha Reeves & The Vandellas (ditto, see above explanation)
9. Everybody Needs Somebody To Love - Blues Brothers
10. Feeling Good - Nina Simone
11. Happy Together - The Turtles
12. Heaven Is A Place On Earth - Belinda Carlisle
13. Heaven Must Have Sent You - The Elgins
14. Here Comes The Sun - Nina Simone
15. I Can't Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch) - The Four Tops
16. I Got You Babe - UB40
17. I Say A Little Prayer - Aretha Franklin (if people know the movie "My Best Friend's Wedding" they'll sing along)
18. I'm a believer - Monkees
19. I'm Coming Out - Diana Ross (this is for the due date)
20. In Dulci Jubilo - Mike Oldfield (very cheerful and something New Age for the collection)
21. It Takes Two - Kim Weston & Marvin Gaye (how a pregnancy begins)
22. My Baby Just Cares For Me - Nina Simone
23. My Girl - The Temptations
24. New Kid In Town - Eagles (I love the Eagles and well... there's a new kid on the way)
25. Reach Out, I'll Be There - Gloria Gaynor
26. Reet Petite - Jackie Wilson (for the Momma)
27. Rock Me Gently - Andy Kim
28. Rock Your Baby - George McCrae
29. Signed, Sealed, Delivered - Stevie Wonder
30. Sugar Baby Love - Rubettes
31. Sugar Sugar - The Archies
32. Sweet Child O' Mine - Guns n Roses (you need hard rock in ANY collection)
33. The Bump - Kenny (the bump=the big pregnant belly)
34. The Way You Do The Things You Do - The Temptations
35. Walking On Sunshine - Katrina & The Waves
36. We Are Family - Sister Sledge
37. You Are So Beautiful - Joe Cocker
38. You Are The Sunshine Of My Life - Stevie Wonder
39. You'll Be In My Heart - Phil Collins

trying to swim to the surface for air

The grief sometimes gushes through me in the form of a tidal wave and sometimes in the form of bittersweet drops of memories. My eyes are always ready to cry. My heart is aching. And I'm afraid. I'm afraid that if the pain subsides I will begin to forget. I will not be able to remember. And then my best friend will be forever lost to me.

I can't get to the claring in the forest yet. I can't let the rays of light touch me. I just want to lay down and cry.

I thought I was all cried out during Eleni's 13 month struggle with stage IV Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Everytime I left the hospital, everytime I left her home, everytime I put down the receiver after our conversations... I would cry ...

tears of... anger.
hoping the doctors were wrong.
hoping for a scientific miracle.
hoping my friend would not suffer, would not know what was coming.

tears of... frustration.
43 years old. too young. too many things to do yet.

selfish tears.
what was I supposed to do without a best friend?
what would happen to me?
how would I go on?

My husband tells me I need to "come back" soon.
My mind knows he's right. I need to get a grip...
it's my heart that won't listen to anyone.