Dec 12, 2005

Cow dung and belly dancing

Last night our DVD player coughed up a BLOCKED message on the LCD screen. Refused to budge open and release the disc that was being kept hostage. It kept flashing ERROR ERROR ERROR. If this thing had arms it would be flapping them around "Danger Will Robinson! Danger!"

All this -quite unsurprisingly- about 10 minutes before the movie ended. In our anguished attempt to find out WHO the murderer was, we took it upon ourselves to revive the dvd player back to play mode. (These exquisitely fine manoeuvres involved banging it on all sides, shouting at it and a whole lot of muttering under the breath).

Nope. It was dead. Time of decease: 10.50 p.m.

So, to ease our nerves and deal with our sudden loss we switched to TV mode.

Click.
Caught a glimpse of a 'Big Brother' show, where someone was yelling at someone else who was scratching his... ear.

Click.
A 'game show' that involved a cow and its dung on a large floor board with various names from the audience. Wherever the dung fell that person would win a car. I'm not absolutely sure about this last part, because just seeing cowdung on a Sunday night TV show cried "Look away! Your eyeballs will melt in your skull!" and I clicked the heck out of there.

Click.
An "investigative reporting" program. A disgusting array of hidden camera and taped phone conversation evidence. Used out of context with a panel of slimy public figures pointing fingers (so that no one points back at them). An overall sad mockery of TV court.

Click.
This time we landed ourselves something "normal": a full-length play-by-play show of Sunday's soccer games.
All of them.
All over the world.
All of the teams.
Sports fanatics we are not. Onward remote.

Click.
A group of various show-biz people & politicians seated around a huge round sofa. There are wine glasses and smoke rising from their cigarettes. Laughing. Incoherent conversation. Title of the show "The party of your life"... suddenly a guest breaks into a song (accompanied by the live band) and all the bimbo-guests start to belly dance.

Click.
"Cleopatra: The TV movie".
We finally found sanctuary with Timothy Dalton as Julius Caesar and Billy Zane as Marc Anthony.
Watched for about 20 minutes until we forgot our woes of the unsolved DVD murder mystery.

Click.
Switched it off.

Sunday night + Greek television programming = an overdose of trashy TV.