Sep 14, 2006

The little witch in me

The little witch in meThe one thing I wished for more than anything as a kid was to receive proof that I was actually a witch amongst mere mortals. When Hagrid, the cuddly half-giant, announced to Harry that "he's a wizard", a tear ran down my cheek. My fantasy come true (well, that, and er, another one in my early adult years with Han Solo dressed as Indiana Jones).

I'm almost certain that deep down inside I possess magical powers. However, the "forces" that regulate witching privileges have decided that I shouldn't reveal them yet or, perhaps, save them for a following life.

Releasing the sorceress in me would not give me the right to grant 'world peace' and 'stop global warming'. There are, after all, wizarding laws that prevent us from intervening with human stupidity. BUT, I would use my nose-twitching, ear-pulling, wand-waving techniques for small, baby-step changes towards the betterment of society.

For instance, this morning as I was going to work I witnessed an imbecile car passenger sling out his styrofoam coffee cup onto the side of the road (straw and all). At that moment I pressed my lips hard and wished my magical powers would surface. I wanted to make that cup bounce back into his lap, spill the remaining contents on his head, shred the styrofoam and stuff it down his pants and stick that straw up his nostril. No, scratch that. His ass.

I guess that's why the "elders slash wise ones" haven't granted me use of magic yet. I'm too creative.



nuntius said...

What kind of witch you are if you don't know that there are little creatures, invisible to most people, that are leaving in the edge of the road? Those creatures feed with the remaings of sigarettes, cups, bottles, plastic etc. Those who have REAL magical powers are feeding those creatures from time to time. In fact, μαλακία στον εγκέφαλο (please translate that for me) is magic, you see it and you don't believe it!

Flubberwinkle said...

You have a point. People that pollute like THAT are too unbelievable, just like magic.

The greek term "malakia ston egkefalo" Nuntius is referring to, can't really be translated word for word, "masturbation in the brain" because no one will accept it as proper English. But, I'm sure everyone gets the general gist of the phrase.

More info on the Greek word malakas and its derivatives here .